It's been a while since I have had a good DB story to share. Lucky for you the child finally provided some good material this weekend.

Yesterday I was stupid enough to ask DB to watch our little Kindergartner for a short time while we were in the garage trying to decide what will move with us and what is trash. I assumed at 9 years old she could handle this task while Mommy was outside. But in true DB form she has proved to me I was once again mistaken.

They were in the TV room watching a movie. It should have been a no brainer. Though it appears my darling daughter was quite the "brain" in her task of "watching" her soon to be step-brother.

We were almost done packing stuff up when our oldest nephew walked out into the garage. Oh yeah...he was supposed to be keeping a watchful eye on them both. Apparently his My Space account takes precedent over anything else. So he walks outside....

Nephew: Ummmm....guys you might wanna come in here and look at this.

R and I stopped what were doing. We hear those words often and it's never because something really really wonderful has happened.

We give each other those "Oh Crap" glances and cautiously walk inside. You never know what shall present itself with the zoo we call our home.

We walk into the TV room.......GASP! OMG!!!

There in the middle of the floor are DB and her "victim". The color drained quickly from our faces and I am certain both R and I looked like this:

DB had taken a box of temporary tattoos and placed them all over the poor boy. This in itself...not too big a deal. The fact that she had used the box of freaking permanent rainbow colored Sharpie markers I keep in my desk to "color" her artwork... well, that presents a problem.

The little one had 2 tattoos on his forehead, 2 on one cheek, 1 on the other cheek, a cutesy multi-colored heart on his chin, and she was working on tattoo # 5 on his little arms.

They both looked at us grinning ear to ear. DB proud of her artistic talents and him for being ...I don't know.....gullible maybe??

Of course neither one of them understood why were upset. Of course DB's defense to using PEMENANT MARKERS on him was the Crayola markers smeared!

So, we take the poor lad into the bathroom and try and remove his biker/circus clown look. We scrub, we rub, and we wash. They faded a wee bit...and I stress the word WEE!

DB knew better. He was "DB Suckered" and he looked the part each and every bit. We tried to remove them again before bed last night and again this morning. Not much luck....of course not.

So, this morning we got to take the little one into school and explain why this little kindergartner is sporting a new look. After the people and his teacher gave us the OMG looks...they tried not to laugh. It's kinda hard.

We left the poor soul at school. We hope he makes it through the day without too much taunting from his peers. Yet, if you could see him...it's doubtful. He of course is oblivious. He doesn't care.

DB is now on marker restriction and will no longer be put in charge of watching anyone or anything for even a moment. Yes, she was "expressing" herself. I just wish she could find outlets other than the walls, floors, and her future brothers.

Anyone want a tattoo? DB apparently does them on the cheap! LOL Hope you are all doing well today. I know this is a somber day of reflection for us all. Thought I would offer up a little DB smile for us all. Take care out there.


AM

I have been in a reflective mood all day long. My mind seems cluttered with thoughts. The winds of change are gusting in my life. Some days I feel like I'm riding the breeze and other days I feel like I'm being swept away.

I've never been afraid of change, most of the time I embrace it, sometimes more slowly than others. Sometime when encountering the day, I just hope and pray that I am doing my best. Some days I'm certain I fail, and then I have to step back re-evaluate.

When I get in my "Deep Thoughts" mode I tend to retreat a little bit. Some people in my life think it is because I am building walls or afraid to put my thoughts and feelings into "verbal expression". Yet, that is not the case.

Yes, I have had intimacy issues in the past. I learn to overcome them day by day. I think more than anything I am just trying to sort out all the "new" chapters that have been added to my life's book.

I feel the responsibility of a lot of people resting upon me right now. I do not take it lightly, and I don't honestly know if I am handling it the right way. I do know that I am undertaking one of the most fragile circumstances my life has yet to encounter. I want to do it the right way. I worry a lot about doing it the right way.

I ma not complaining nor am I upset. I just so deeply want to do the right thing by the important people in my life right now. Sometimes I wish my life came with a handbook or a cheat sheet of sorts. My best told me that would take the "excitement" out of life. I told him that I could certainly use a little less "exciting" right now.

No, life here is never dull. Each day brings new challenges and change. That's life for us all isn't it? I was scared that I wasn't ready, but life has a unique way of making you ready. Most often in ways you couldn't have imagined prior.

Sometimes you just have to trust that life will never give you more than you can handle. My grandmother, whom I miss dearly used to say that to me when I was growing up. She said it to me again 4 days before she passed away when I was having a hard time dealing with her illness. Perhaps I hear her words echoing in my thoughts today because there is a simple truth in it.

The weekend is upon us. I am glad that we have nothing scheduled or anywhere to be. We did find a house this week. I shall write about it later. So, that is one good accomplishment and thing to check off the never ending To Do List!

Just needed to put some thoughts down. Hope I didn't ramble too much here. Yet, somehow I know you guys don't mind. You are most likely used to my rambling by now!

Ya'll have a great weekend. Stay out of trouble...and if you don't you know I want to hear all about it! Take care out there.


AM

I'm off work this week. This is supposed to give me and R the chance to go look at houses, but as I type the boy is still on the phone for "work" and keeps giving me the five minute sign. This started about 2 hours ago. Perhaps I was wrong about exactly how long 5 minutes actually was....must be comprised of a zillion minutes!

The weekend was quite fun.

I am convinced that my life resembles a mix between All My Children, Gilligan’s Island, Melrose Place, and The Simpson’s.

I believe that my life would offer up wonderful scripts for a sitcom, or two. Hell, I might even win an Emmy.

Friday R's Ex came to get their 2 kids. She was supposed to keep them until Sunday afternoon. But she showed up on Saturday evening with the kiddos in tow. Somehow she must be confused on her days of the week. (Mental Note To Self: Buy R's Ex calendar for Christmas!)

She keeps saying she just needs time to herself. For the record she annoys the Hell out of me. We didn't argue with her we just took the boys and off she went into the wild blue yonder. I'm certain she shall "find" herself at all the local bars. I'm certain that is where her true self is hiding out.

The nephews Mom was in town for the holiday weekend. She was supposed to come see the boys Saturday, but she called and said something had come up and she would certainly be at our house for the cook out on Sunday. Do you sense a theme here people?

Sunday we were stupid enough to have all our family and friends over for a cook out. I made a ton of food, and really didn't mind too much as I now have a house full of "helpers". I bet it will be a long time before my ready made family asks me to host anything again.

We had about 40 people here and a million kids. It was a chaotic zoo, but we all seemed to have a good time. R and I managed to handle our wacky family members with greater ease thanks to the distraction of some good friends. Need to send them all some flowers and thank you cards!

Yet, Sunday didn't bring R's sister to the house. Every time the phone rang the boys anxiously stood around listening. They were excited to see her. They left her a lot of messages, but it always went straight into voice mail. R tried calling her several times, but the girl wasn't answering.

The cook out came and went. After I got the youngest kids in bed, R's oldest nephew was helping me clean up. He was talking about his date Saturday night. Yes, for the record he handled it very well. He was home a little bit before curfew! We were proud and relieved!

We were in the kitchen and the phone rang. It is now about 11 PM at night. R answered the phone and I knew within moments it was his sister. I could hear the tone in his voice go from jovial to pissed off. He walked into the other room. His nephew looked at me and kind of put his head down. Sadly at 16 he knows his Momma all too well. And he knew that the conversation was going to turn ugly.

Here's a brief history on our two nephews. Their Mom has been in and out of Drug Rehab 7 times since she was 18 years old. The boy’s father is nowhere to be found at all. They have spent their lives being shuffled from relative to relative in-between their Mom's relapses. They have had more Step-Fathers than Paris Hilton has clothes and even when their Mom is around she isn't really around. She has no patience for the boys. She spends most of the time yelling and screaming at them.

When she went through this recent divorce she said she wanted to move back to Dallas. She asked if she could send the boys for a few weeks so she can wrap up loose ends. Two weeks has turned into a lot longer. We are 100% positive she is using again and it has been a very difficult thing for the boys to handle as well as everyone else.

When the boys first got here they were angry and acted out a lot. Yet, they have come a long way in the time they have been here. They really need some stability. We have offered that to them. They are doing well in school and making new friends. They are adjusting quite well. Sometimes I think they just need some TLC and attention.

At this point I can hear R yelling. I pour two glasses of iced tea and walk his nephew outside to sit by the pool. He is quiet for a minute and then he looks up at me.

N: She's using again isn't she?

AM: I don't know.

N: Please don't BS me okay AM? Is she using again?

I pause for a moment. I want to tell him no because I see the fear in his eyes. Yet, he's a smart kid who has been lied to a lot in his life. I'm no expert in how to handle this type of conversation, but I decided if anything he deserved to hear the truth. I want him to trust us.

AM: We think she is using again, but we're not completely sure.

His head dropped to the table and I could hear him sigh. My heart ached for him. He often appears older than his years. He was forced to grow up a lot sooner than he should have. It is written all over his face.

N: I think she is using too. Are you guys going to send her back to rehab?

AM: We'd like it if she went back, but we can’t make her.

N: I know.

He knows the way this all goes. He has lived it many times. It may be new to me, but it isn't new to him.

N: Is she going to take us and make us move again?

AM: I don't know.

N: I don't want to move again. I like it here. I am tired of being the new guy.

AM: I know. You and your brother can stay here as long as you like. You don't have to move if you don't want to.

N: You don't need two more kids.

AM: Of course we do. Who is going to help do dishes, clean and mow the yard?

I smile at him and he smiles back for a minute.

N: If she's using again I don't want to see her. No one can make me see her okay?

I nod. And again we sit in silence. I hear him mutter something under his breath and then he just started crying. I hug him, but I know there are no words I can offer. I know I can't hug it away. And my heart aches for him. He is a child paying a deep price for the choices his Mom makes, and the pain it causes him is deeper than I can imagine.

R walks outside. The call is over. He has a very serious look on his face. He sits down in front of us. He reaches over and hugs his nephew. We sit in silence for what seems like forever.

R: You want to stay with us?

N: Yes

R: Then you stay. You can stay and finish school with us if you want.

N: I do. But you don't have the room for us. I don't want to be in the way.

R: You aren't in the way. We will have the room soon when we move. We'll just have to hang in there until we find a bigger place. You're family and you are always welcome here.

N: She's using isn't she?

R: I think so but she isn't ready to admit it now. We decided its best you both stay here for now....for as long as you want.

N: Thank you.

So, this week we are looking at houses. Building the Dream house will wait. I made appointments for the two boys today. I think they need a professional to talk to. This is bigger than R and I, and we don't want them to grow up repressing all of this hurt and anger.

I am learning as I go here people. If anyone has any advice on how to handle this situation I would appreciate it very much. I am in uncharted territory.

Going to go bug R again. Wonder if his freakin' 5 minutes is up yet???

Take care out there!


AM

I am working at home today trying to get caught up on mounds of paper work. I cannot see my desk or floor in my home office. It appears that a trash compactor threw up in here!

Our oldest nephew (who’s living with us) who is 16 has apparently wasted no time in making new "lady" friends since moving to Dallas. The boy is quite a looker, and I can understand why the girls are all "giddy" over him, but MY GAWD do they have to ring our phone 8 million times a day?

This is new to me. I have no experience with teenagers. He's certainly teaching me what I have to look forward to in the future. And let's be real...I AM AFRAID!

He asked R and I if he could borrow the car on Saturday night so that he can take one of the girls in his "hoochie posse" to dinner and a movie.

R asked him a few questions about the girl, and where they wanted to go etc. I sat watching and listening to the two studs talking about dating and girls. It was amusing to see how the cave men perceive the whole dating process. I was waiting for R to give him the high five. I am certain he would have had I not been in the room and smacked his head.

R said he would think about it, but I already know R will let him. I told him I thought he was old enough to go on a date as long as he was home on time and as long as he took R's car and not mine!

When I was talking to the oldest this morning about the girl he wanted to take out he informed me it wasn't serious. He told me he was too "young" to get tied down and it was a “casual” thing.

Someone please tell me what it means when a 16 year old, walking hormone says it's a "casual" thing? Should I be scared? Cuz for some reason...due to the amount of lady callers he has...I have a bad, bad feeling about his dating adventures. I dare say I may have a little player in my midst!

R says I am reading too much into it. Perhaps I am. Yet, I grew up with brothers and a lot of close guy friends. They all went through their "dog" years. Something tells me I have no idea what is in store having a teenager in my house. Maybe I should just lock him in his room until graduation??

Life is full of new experiences as of late. Learning and "growing" as I go here. Maybe I should chaperone his date Saturday night? That wouldn't be asking too much would it? I am certain it would in no way affect his "cool" status with the girls! He may never speak to me again...but at least nothing would get too "casual" on his night out!

Lord have mercy! I better get back to this pile of work. It's only a matter of hours before the kids are home and the golden silence is replaced with chaos.

Take care out there!


AM

This morning was quite entertaining in our house.

I got up early and was ready before I even had to wake the kids. I was feeling mighty proud of myself.

After I awoke the living dead (a.k.a. the kiddos) I sat them around the breakfast table. I made pancakes and bacon and even made fresh juice. I was on a roll!

DB on the other hand woke up on the wrong side of the bed. She was in no way shape or form ready to make the morning easy on any of us.

When she came down for breakfast I told her to sit down and eat. She was in a panic mode. She was huffing and puffing like an old man trying to climb the stairs.

AM: Honey, what's wrong?

DB: WHERE'S MY HOMEWORK? WHO TOUCHED MY HOMEWORK?

Her voice is shrill and pissy. She is scanning the kids at the breakfast table like they are all on the Most Wanted list. There is silence.

DB: My homework is gone! Someone took my homework!!

AM: Did you look in your back pack?

She rolls her eyes at me and gives me the "Duh" look without muttering a word. I hate when she does that...she has perfected that look like an art form.

DB: It's not in my back pack. Don't you think I would know if it was in my back pack? Where is it?

She is running room to room crying and complaining. She comes back into the kitchen all kinds of mad.

DB: Ya'll better help me find my homework!

She's speaking like a little dictator and it is starting to make me mad.

AM: DB, I told you last night a million times to put that homework in your back pack. You informed me a million times that you had already done it and that you were not and I quote, "Stupid". Now you cannot find your homework. Do you think that is my fault or any of the people at the tables fault?

She is quiet for a minute. I can practically see the steam blowing from her ears. I can see her mind churning for a good response. It's quiet. I await either a smart ass retort, or complete silent treatment.

And I was wrong on both guesses. DB went into full melt down mode. I am certain she deserves an Oscar or an Emmy.

AM: It’s not my fault I cannot find my homework! It's not my job to make sure I have everything in place. That's your job! Moms are supposed to make sure their kids have their stuff! I have lots of homework now. Do you know how hard 4th grade is Momma??

I bite my tongue. I stand in awe looking at her. Her hair is flying about as she screams and her eyes are overflowing with complete and utter anger.

AM: DB, yes, I know how hard 4th grade can be. I am certain I was once in 4th grade a long, long, long time ago...in a galaxy far far away!

I cannot help but laugh. I try to muffle it, but I can't. This makes her angrier. At this point R comes downstairs and asks what is going on. DB turns to him and says in her best puppy dog voice, "I can't find my homework, and nobody cares."

He looks at me knowing very well that's not the case. He tells her he will help her find it. She informs him that it's lost forever and ever and she's never going to find it because someone did something with it. She's positive we threw it away.

I want to tell her to stop being silly. Or say something like, "Yes, DB we worked with you on homework last night for 2 hours only because we secretly wanted to throw it out when you were sleeping!" However, I refrain.

Within minutes R and DB return to the kitchen....homework in hand. It's a miracle! The Trash Gods must have spit it back out! Hurry...someone call the Vatican...we have a true miracle in our house!

She sits down to eat her breakfast. She doesn't look up and she doesn't utter a word.

R: DB, do you have something to say?

AM: Not really.

He looks at her with a stern look. She rolls her eyes and drops her fork.

DB: Okay, I am sorry. I found my homework.

She returns to eating. I make a mental note that she and I will be having a long talk after school today. Her homework was found right where she had left it last night. On her desk. Yet, I am certain the 15 minute morning melt down was simply for my entertainment and for no other reason.

Gotta love these kinds of days! How dull would life be without them?

I wonder if I could get away with that at work??

Happy Tuesday Ya'll! Take care out there!

AM