Okay, just got back from the mall, with my daughter. Have I said how much I hate the mall? Yes, I know...it's Un-American, and against the female religion, but I truly dislike them.

Don't get me wrong. I love clothes and shoes (kinda have a shoe fetish, sad, huh?) but I also love internet shopping. If I could do all my shopping that way, I would. My daughter however LOVES the mall. (I see a part-time job in her teenage future), and she needed a new pair of tennis shoes. I swear this kids feet grow every 2 weeks! Think anyone at her school would notice if she just started goin' barefoot? Mmmm...Food for thought! LOL

Anyway, I had picked her up from her slumber party before we went. Nothing like being with an 8 year old, who is greatly sleep deprived, and coming off a 24 hour sugar rush (I swear she had the shakes! LOL) to make the Saturday mall experience that much better! Not.

Anyway, mission accomplished. Got the shoes, after much debate with grumpy pants. I thought I was going to lose my mind, but somehow I survived it. Was going to take my daughter to dinner and a movie tonight, but after the VERY LOVELY break down she had in the car, I have changed my mind. Hey, I do not have a death wish. Tonight, it's ordering pizza, getting her to bed before she "freaks" out, and a nice glass of red wine for me.

Now, if I can only make it through dinner time. God, I wish the child would take a nap. :-)

Anywho....my date went well last night. We had a great time. Dinner was really good. I so love the sushi! I know people either love it or hate, not too many people in the middle on the sushi thing. But it was good. We had a couple of drinks there and ended up being there for like 2 hours.

Then we headed to this cool little bar, and had a drink and listened to music. It was a good night. "Adam" is a nice guy, and the conversation came easy. I had fun, and I am glad I decided to go. He asked me if I want to go with him to a hockey game, and I was like, "Duh, of course!" I love hockey, love my Dallas Stars. Anyway, we'll see what happens...

Well, I guess I am going to go do some laundry and cleaning. Hate laundry...wish I never had to venture into the laundry room...but alas, it must be done. Hey when is a child old enough to start doing laundry, so I can pass the torch to my little grumpy one?? That ought to make her love me even more!

My cousin emailed this to me today...thought it was funny, and I'd share it here. I figured the women out there would get a kick out of it!

"ESTROGEN ISSUES"
10 WAYS TO KNOW IF YOU HAVE "ESTROGEN ISSUES"

1. Everyone around you has an attitude problem.
2. You're adding chocolate chips to your cheese omelet.
3. The dryer has shrunk every last pair of your jeans.
4. Your husband is suddenly agreeing to everything you say.
5. You're using your cellular phone to dial up every bumper sticker
that says: "How's my driving-call 1- 800-".
6. Everyone's head looks like an invitation to batting practice.
7. Everyone seems to have just landed here from "outer space".
8. You can't believe they don't make a tampon bigger than Super Plus.
9. You're sure that everyone is scheming to drive you crazy.
10. The ibuprofen bottle is empty and you bought it yesterday..

TOP TEN THINGS ONLY WOMEN UNDERSTAND
10. Cats' facial expressions.
9. The need for the same style of shoes in different colors.
8. Why bean sprouts aren't just weeds.
7. Fat clothes.
6. Taking a car trip without trying to beat your best time.
5. The difference between beige, ecru, cream, off-white, and eggshell.
4. Cutting your hair to make it grow.
3. Eyelash curlers.
2. The inaccuracy of every bathroom scale ever made.

AND, the Number One Number One thing only women understand:
1. OTHER WOMEN

Well, Friday has finally arrived, and to put it mildly I am really really glad!

It's been a laid back day today. I had meetings this morning, and now I am doing a few things at home, waiting for a conference call at 3, and then the day is over! :-) Yippee!

Well, I firmed up my date plans last night. Last time we went out we went out to dinner and a movie...standard date I guess. It's kinda hard to talk and get to know someone sittin' in the theater. Tonight we are going to go to dinner, and then to this little place near downtown for drinks and to listen to some music. Should be cool.

It's always kind of awkward the first few dates. He asked me where I wanted to go eat tonight, and I told him I didn't care, whatever he chose would be fine. I'm sure guys must hate that answer....it certainly must not be helpful. I'm sure he's as nervous picking a place as I would be suggesting one. Anyway, we finally decided on this sushi place near downtown Dallas. It's a very cool restaurant, and I love sushi, and apparently he does too. So, that appears to be the plan.

He's a good guy. Very cute, funny, and there is something about him that just makes him easy to talk to and hang out with. I actually met him this summer, but wasn't ready to date yet after break up with Mr. Ex-Boyfriend. I am a firm believer in giving yourself time so you don't get caught up in the hellish rebound thing!! Not fun! I ran into him again before the holidays and we started talking. Was actually kinda surprised that he was still single...Anywho....

So, now to figure out what to wear....and I guess I better shave my legs! LOL

Was talking with a guy friend of mine last night, he was actually my first serious boyfriend in high school, and somehow we have remained friends all these years. Kind of funny. I think he's probably one of the few ex's that I'm still friends with. It's cool, I can talk to him about guys and he talks to me about girls he dates...and he's always got great advice! Not.

He's my eternal bachelor friend....pretty soon he's going to have to expand his dating pool outside of Dallas! LOL He called to invite me to play poker tonight with some friends...so, I was telling him I had a date tonight, and he was giving me a hard time. I got this email from him this morning...

Morning Sunshine!

I cannot understand why you’d rather go out on a date instead of hanging out with us, drinking beer, smokin’ cigars, but to each their own.

Have fun tonight. Here’s a little bit of advice for you. Thought it would help you out.

1.Wear something sexy, not too sexy as you don’t wanna show all the goods before the purchase. But that doesn’t mean jeans and that damn raggedy UT sweatshirt either!

2.Wear your hair down tonight. You know how you get that whole school marm thing going when you wear your hair up. Not sexy!

3.Do not order a salad tonight. I hate it when I take girls out and they order the damn salad and water with freaking lemon! Eat a damn steak or half a pig or something. However, do not eat too fast, and burping is not cool.

4.Don’t mix your alcohol….remember Cancun 2003. That will not get you another date.

5.Don’t just talk about girly things. Talk about sports, and your favorite beer, and how talented you are with the remote control.

6.Don’t talk about religion or politics either, on second thought maybe you should just sit there and look cute.

7.If he goes to kiss you make sure you tell him about your not going to first base until the 15th date rule. That will make you a keeper!

8.Don’t talk about your ex’s or your mother.

9.Make sure you are home by midnight. You don’t want to give the impression of being a Lady of the Night.

10.Finally, have fun, be yourself (in small doses LOL) and don’t waste too much time feeling bad that you aren’t playin’ poker with us tonight. I know it’s gonna be hard, but I’m sure you will have fun anyway…kind of.

Later Kiddo!

I replied to his email with this:

Dear Abby:

Thanks for your wonderful dating advice. I am certain if I follow it to the letter, it will make for a very successful date. And to think all of our friends are baffled by the fact that you are still single! It's a mystery. Enjoy the poker, drink some beer, and scratch for me!

Well ya'll, I'm out of here. Wish me luck. Happy Friday to all!

I am tired today. So wish I could crawl into bed and go to sleep, but that ain't happening anytime soon. I think it's just the end of the week kind of tired...thank God tomorrow is Friday! Bring on the weekend.

Had meetings all day today. Not sure how sitting on your butt, listening to other people talk can make you so tried....but somehow it did. Kinda sad huh? LOL

It seems like everyone on the planet has been calling today. I'm not in a social mood today....feeling like taking the darn phone of the hook. I know...I sound like a big whiny baby. Some days when I get home I just really want to shut it all down and veg...I have this weird feeling that today isn't going to allow that.

Talked with a good friend this morning. Her Dad was just diagnosed with Lou Gherigs disease. I wasn't really sure what that was...did a little research tonight, and my heart sank for her. It seems to be a slow and brutal killer...I felt bad when she called this morning because I know she wanted to talk, but I was literally walking into a meeting. Tried to call her back when I got home, but no answer.

I am never good at knowing what to say in situations like that. I always seem to fumble over my words. I hate that. I can think of a zillion things I should have said after the fact, but in "the moment" forget about it! I am a true idiot!!!

I have a date tomorrow night. Not sure how I feel about it. We have gone out a few times, and he's a really cool guy. I don't know what my problem is....I think I need a good swift kick in the ass sometimes. I am sure it will be fun, but tonight I sit here wishing I could get out of it. I'd rather sit on my behind and watch bad TV all night tomorrow....sad huh? Who knows... supposed to call him tonight and firm up plans....

Well, not much else to say today. Gonna go finish dinner, and get the little one to bed, and then veg until I fall asleep. Exciting life I lead huh? :-)

Okay, she's my Mom, I'm a Mom, and she had a Mom...so tell me this...why are the two of us so foreign in this universe we share??

I love my Mom. I really do. I come from a very close family, and we all get along (most of the time) fairly well. I am old enough to know I have been truly blessed by my family. I'm lucky. Yet, there is this little thing with my Mom and I that drives me CRAZY!!!!!

My Mom and I are very different in a lot of ways. She's blonde, with blue eyes; I have dark hair and dark eyes. She grew up on a farm with 8 brothers and sisters; I grew up in the "city" with two brothers. She believed that a girl should marry young, have children, and stay at home to take care of her family. I believe that every girl should go to college, chase her own dreams, marry, and have a family without having to give up everything. She's what I call old school, and though I admire much of what that entails there are moments when it drives me insane!

I stopped by to see my folks tonight. My dad had a serious accident last month, and I thought I'd bring him some homemade cookies, and some DVD's for him to watch while he is home on the mend.

It was by all accounts a great day. Work went well, my daughter was in a great mood after school, and the weather here was so beautiful that it felt like Spring had arrived here in North Texas.

The visit started out well enough. Little chit chat with Dad, small talk...and then it starts....

It's always subtle at first. My Mom has this amazing way of starting out her "little thing" slow and easy, so that if you blink you might miss it!

It starts with, "Gee honey, are you getting enough rest, you look so tired with those bags under your eyes."

I reply, "Yes, Mom. I got 8 hours last night." And then I am thinking do I have bags under my eyes? Mmmmm, hadn't noticed.

And then it's "Are you eating enough at home? You look a little gaunt." What the heck...and who uses the word gaunt anymore???

"No, Mom. I eat plenty thanks."

"Oh, well I just thought with your busy schedule that may be you guys weren't eating right."

Ugh! What does that mean? Now she isn't only referring to me, but my daughter.

"So, how's work honey? You know you really should find something that better suits your lifestyle. (What the hell is my lifestyle anyway, I sure wish she'd tell me!). My friend’s daughter blah, blah, blah....(there is always some story about some friend’s kid who’s doing something amazing...) I worry that you work too much."

Ok, she's never been big on women working outside of the home, but I grow so tired of it. She has not approved of one job I have had since graduating college. Oh wait, she did approve of my short career as a wife...but that didn't come with any long term stability or a 401K plan.

"You know I was talking with your brother and he said he's invited you to dinner three times and you have been busy. Family is so important; you know you really should call him. I think you hurt his feelings."

Ugh. Talk to my older brother all the time, and yes, amazing that I actually have a life. Didn't realize he was so heartbroken over the dinner thing. Is she talking about the same older brother I am? The guy who hardly has time for anything or anyone?? Whatever.

Then she asks me if my outfit is new. I tell her no, that I got it before the holidays. She smiles and says, "I could never wear that color, it just washes me out, but you seem to be able to pull it off." She kinda smirks. I am kinda getting irritated.

Then she tells me that we are getting together for my little brothers birthday in a few weeks. She tells me she's asking everyone to bring something and I ask her what I should bring and she says, 'Nothing honey, you have enough going on. Don't worry about it!"

UGH UGH UGH! I bet you a zillion dollars that if I actually showed up in two weeks without bringing something she'd have something to say about it.

I hate this game she plays, this stupid Mother/Daughter dance we seem to have perfected. Why can't she say what she's really thinking?? I mean she never talks this way to my brothers...ever.

I make a few comments, my Dad laughs. She looks at me and says "What's so funny?" My Dad and I share the same dry sense of humor and she has never shared in it. She glares at me as if I made the comments to leave her out of the conversation on purpose.

The dance continues back and forth over stupid trivial things, until I decided I have to leave. I have got to get in my car and go anywhere but here. I tell them good-bye. She gives the guilt trip that she hardly sees her granddaughter (MY GAWD the woman sees Ash 3-4 times a week!!) and I get in the car and breathe.

I realize that I suddenly feel like a 12 year old. It's amazing. Every time I walk in her door a confidant young woman, I leave feeling like I did when I was in junior high.

I turn the radio up, we wave good-bye. I look in the rear view mirror at my daughter. She is reading a book and oblivious to anything and everything.

I pray out loud, like so many daughters across America have done....

"Please God....please do not let me be like my mother!!!"

And I vow to never do to my daughter what my Mom does to me. I figure I have a 50/50 shot at success.

Ugh, Mom's....can't live with them, can't live without them. As much as I love her....she is the only person in my life who can truly deeply utterly drive me to the edge....all whilst never even raising her voice!

Moms!