Have you ever had one of those weekends where you blink and it's over? Man, oh man...this weekend passed so quickly!

First of all I see that my fellow streamers are pretty sure I had a visit from the local Fire Department Friday. Ya'll have such little faith in me! LOL I did not burn the house down, but I did manage to stumble through my romantic evening with the grace of an elephant!

R's flight was a little delayed, but not too bad. He was really surprised at the evening I had planned. You see he's the one who is usually Mr. Romance, and I dare say I don't think the boy thought I had it in me! Proved him wrong! Kinda!

I told him he was like the chick in the relationship. That apparently is not a cool thing to say to your "manly" man. You should also not make "chick" noises after saying it over and over again. Man, when something tickles me into fits of giggles, I just run with it! This is a sure people pleasing ability.

The fondue was amazing! I am now in love with my new fondue set! We just might get hitched soon! I think we should just fondue everything from now on! It will be like a fonduepoolza! Man that stuff is addicting. I also managed to eat it without dripping it all over myself...shocking. I usually end up wearing about 1/2 of what I eat!

My Friday night was a hit. Saturday night however was with the family. I am never allowing R to talk to my Mom again when he's at my house and I am in the shower. Apparently the boy doesn't know how to tell her "NO WAY IN HELL DO WE WANT TO COME OVER FOR DINNER SATURDAY!" I am so going to have to teach that boy to be rude, or screen the calls!

I love my family, but lately we have seen way too much of them. Next weekend we have back to back family "events"! And everything with my family turns out to be an event.

Last night after dinner we were getting ready to play cards. Mom had already consumed a few glasses of vino and was rather lively I must say. We were helping her clean off the table and her and the wine must have decided the following conversation was appropriate....

Mom: So, R you really have a thing for my daughter huh?

R: *smiles and nods his head*

Mom: So, do I hear wedding bells in the future?

AM: *shoots Mom the Death Rays*

R: *loses all color in his face*

R: Well, um, sure maybe some day.

AM: Some day like 2010.

Mom: Oh AM stop it. You're gonna have to jump into the marriage water again some day.

AM: Don't have to jump if I push you in first!

Mom: But I'm already married.

AM: And if you want to be around for that next anniversary I suggest we talk about something else.

R: *laughing* AM, be nice to your mother.

He smiles at me with that evil little grin. He enjoys it on some level. He has no idea that the "family games" are just beginning. Stupid, stupid boy!

Mom: I mean you practically live together.

AM: No we don't.

Mom: Yes you do. He's there all the time or you are at his place all the time.

AM: How do you know this? Are you stalking me?

Mom: *gives me the raspberries*

Mom: You know a man won't buy the cow if he gets the milk for free!

At this point R and my brother are laughing hysterically. I on the other hand want to play Frisbee with Mom using her good china! She's a bad catch!

At some point my brother finally deems it necessary to step in and divert the conversation. At that point it doesn't matter. She's put it out there already...wedding talk! I swear she'd marry me off to the first guy who asked. He could be a serial killer and she wouldn't mind as long as I had a ring on my finger!

So all day today R has been singing that annoying song....Going to the chapel! He's doing this for no other reason than to annoy me! He's so not getting any TLC from me tonight. Hope he stocked up on that Friday. I feel a dry spell coming on!

He keeps walking by and I keep minimizing my screen. If he's going to keep annoying me with that freaking song, I am going to act like I am doing something top secret over here. If he only knew how boring the stuff I write about actually is he wouldn't care. But he doesn't! So, I shall use this to taunt him. He wants to write a post for my blog. I told him I would take a vote and if you guys said he could than I would think about it. He may or may not have given me the bird!

So, should I let Barry Manilow over here write a post this week? Cast your votes now..

Got to go see how all of you are doing this fine Sunday. Take care out there,

AM

Friday is finally upon us! I am so glad the weekend is here....

Well, I have my romantic night for "R" planned! I am pretty damn proud of myself! Now if only I can get the boy home safe and sound. He is supposed to be flying in from the East Coast about 7 tonight. Yet, the weather is supposed to get really bad this evening. He is as I type this trying to get an earlier flight home...so cross your fingers and toes!

I think I may be crazy. I'm not an overly mushy person, but I am going to give it my best shot. It just might back fire in my face and he may think I am a nut! He does romantic so well; I on the other hand stumble through romance like a drunken sailor! It scares me to the bone!

I have my living room set up to go! I placed a lot of comfy blankets and pillows around the fireplace. I have candles ready to light up the room. Let's just hope I don't start a fire! It could happen.

I am making 5 different kinds of fondue. My best friend gave me this amazing fondue set for Christmas, and I am finally going to break it in. We're going to fondue some meats, some cheese, some veggies, and some fruit. I hope it turns out okay.

I picked up a few bottles of his favorite wine! You know if all else fails get the boy all liquored up!

I went to the mall last night and spent some quality time with my good friend Victoria's Secret! That store and I should never "visit"! I went in to get something sexy for tonight and came out with three bags of garments I am certain I don't need!

Then I got the boy some silk boxers so he can be some yummy eye candy for me! LOL Just kidding! Not really! The boy does "boxers" rather well!

I made a CD with some of his favorite music. I never thought I would do that. Never, ever! Don't tell anyone! If you did they wouldn't believe you any way.

I also picked up a few other things, but got to keep those to myself. It's a James Bond kind of thing!

So, wish me a little luck tonight. I hope all of you have a wonderful night!

We have another family function to attend tomorrow night, so this is my one night to relax. Not sure how we got suckered into tomorrow but that is another story.

Take care out there and I will be stopping by to visit you guys soon! Happy Friday!

AM

Just when you thought you have heard it all....the Village Idiots bestow upon you yet another "gift"!

I was in my office this morning and three of the guys that work for me came down to see me. They asked if they could have a few minutes of my time. This is nothing out of the ordinary; they work together, so I agreed. But as soon as the door closed they sat down quietly, and began nervously looking around at each other. They all looked like the cat that ate the canary.

You see I had sent the threesome (We'll call them the 3 Stooges) down to Austin late last week to meet with a client from New York. Larry, Moe, and Curly have been handling this account and it should have been a simple "adventure". Alas, nothing is ever simple is it?

Larry: AM, we just thought we should come down and talk to you about last week before you hear it from someone else.

These words sent chills down my spine. Although they are young guys, they are some of my best Rep's. I have never once had an issue with them. And suddenly I was scared.

Moe: Well, you know we met with Mr. X (our client) that day and agreed to meet up for dinner.

I nod.

Moe: Well we may or may not have had a few drinks before we met him for dinner.

AM: You either did or you didn't? How many?

Larry: A few.

AM: How many is a few to you?

Curly: We had about 4 or 5 drinks.

Oh, this story is starting out with alcohol it can't be good.

Larry: We met him for dinner and then we had some wine with dinner.

AM: How much wine?

Moe: A few bottles.

AM:

Larry: Afterwards our client wanted to go down to 6th street.

At this point I think I gasped and placed my hands over my eyes.

If you have never been to Austin, 6th street is the place to go when you are there. It's a street of bars, places to listen to live music, and a college kids dream come true.

I know this because I went to school down there. Austin is known for its culture and producing more live music than any other city in Texas. 6th street is a must, but not a "must" for the drunken 3 Stooges and a very important client.

AM: Let me stop you now. Do I want to hear the rest of this story? Did the night end with hugs and kisses?

Larry, Moe, Curly:

Moe: We were having a good time and Mr. X was really enjoying the night life.

Larry: We were walking to the next bar and Curly had to go to the bathroom.

I looked over at Curly who was now staring at the floor and tapping his feet.

Larry: And he was pretty drunk.

AM: Get on with it.

Moe: He couldn't hold it any more so he decided to relieve himself in-between two buildings.

AM:

AM: You pissed in front of a client?

Curly: No, he couldn't really see me.

Moe: But the Austin police did.

AM: Oh Gawd! *slamming head on desk*

6th street is patrolled by the police like crazy! I am sure the drunken fools down there provide the police department with 90% of their business! You don't pee on 6th street. It'd be like taking a leak in front of the White House.

Moe: Well, the police came over and told Curly they were going to ticket him for indecent exposure.

AM: So, you got a ticket?

Curly: Not really.

AM: Okay, I am confused. Not really what??

Moe: He got arrested.

AM: What? You got arrested in front of a client for pissing???

Curly: No.

AM: If someone does not get to the moral of this story in about 5 seconds I am going to blow a gasket.

Moe: He got arrested for arguing and cussing out the police officer who was going to issue him the ticket.

AM: WHAT THE HELL???

Curly: I am sorry.

AM: Sorry? You got drunk, peed in public, and then got arrested for mouthing off to a cop? And you did this in front of one of our best clients???

Curly: Yes.

AM:

Moe: The client was cool about it.

AM: Cool about it? What was he supposed to do? He was down there with you three babbling, drunken, pissing idiots! What was he supposed to do???

There was a deafening silence. I felt sick to my stomach. How in the Hell would I ever explain this to the higher ups if it hit the surface?

We sat there for about 5 minutes. It was awkward I am sure. Honestly my mind was racing a million miles a minutes and I just wanted to walk over to each of them and bitch slap them into next week.

Moe: We just thought you should know. It will not ever happen again.

AM:

Curly: I'll do anything to make this better.

AM:

Moe: AM, what do you want us to do?

AM: GET OUT! Walk away from this office quietly. Do not utter a word of this to anyone you hear me? Get out before I say something I might regret. I have got to figure out how I am going to clean up this mess.

They walked out of my office like puppy dogs with their tails between their legs. And I spent the next hour doing this:



Glad I enjoyed my quiet night last night, if not I just might have gone postal and you would now be watching my melt down on CNN! It is never, and I repeat never safe to go back in the water!

AM

I survived my Monday! I think it is safe to say that I had a bad case of the grumpies yesterday! I was not the most pleasant girl to be around yesterday, and I am certain everyone around me is glad that I woke up on the right side of the bed today!

I am looking forward to my evening. DB is going to grandma's house and R is on his way to the East coast for work until Friday. I am actually going to have a night to myself for the first time in a long time!

I love my daughter and my boyfriend, but it will be nice to have a little "me" time tonight. Life has been so crazy and busy that I feel I need a little time to catch my breath! If not I fear I might turn into one of the evil Muppets on my icon! That would not be a good thing would it? LOL

I am sure it must sound a bit selfish, but the last few weeks have left me feeling a bit pulled in too many directions. Tonight there will be no pulling...just me, myself, and I! Rock on!

R stopped by the office on his way to the airport. Poor guy. I have been a bit harsh on him. He's been wearing that "I'm sorry" puppy dog look since Sunday. I felt bad, so I called the hotel he will be staying at and arranged to have some flowers and wine waiting in his room tonight. Maybe that will make him smile a bit and realize I didn't mean to be so grumpy. I can be a hand full sometimes, and I know it. He's a great boyfriend and a real trooper. I hope I don't lose sight of that.

I want to plan a romantic night for me and R on Friday! Any suggestions for a wonderful cozy night? Should I make dinner, or take him out? Want to give him a memorable night...any pointers would be appreciated!

Nothing much going on today. That's kind of odd for me isn't it? So, I am going to embrace it and savor my "Me" time like there's no tomorrow! Hope you all are having a wonderful Tuesday! Take care out there in Blogger Land!

AM

It's Monday....AGAIN! This day of the week seems to follow me around like a lost puppy dog! What's up with that? Grrrrr!

Last night I was at R's house. He was making me dinner for putting me through Hell on Saturday at the golf course. First of all I was shocked to find out the boy could really cook. It's amazing what he doesn't "share" with me when I am cooking for him all the time. Yet, when the pressure was forced upon him he came out looking like Emeril! Wonder what else he hasn't "shared" yet? Mmmmm....food for thought.

So, we are just getting ready to sit down to enjoy our meal and a much needed quiet night alone....when the door bell rang. Looking back we should have acted like we were not home. But then again we both are pretty stupid.

Our dinner time visitor was none another than one of R's close friends (we'll call him Dip Shit) and his flavor of the evening (we'll call her Queen Air Head). Upon seeing them I wanted to make R shut the door and tell them we didn't need anymore Girl Scout cookies.

But no...my stupid boyfriend invited them in, and gave me his best "I'm sorry" look. Seems he was giving me that look a whole lot this weekend. And don't think I have not been keeping tabs on it!

So, Dip Shit comes in with this chic whom I sure he just met at a local bar or something. She is dressed in clothes that are so small I am certain she grabbed her daughter's clothes by mistake. She is over flowing from this outfit with no shame whatsoever. Nothing like a strangers boobs staring back at you before you eat dinner.

R explains that we were just getting ready to sit down for dinner. Surely, Dip Shit will get the hint and leave, right? Nope. He walks over to the fridge and grabs him and boob girl some beers. This guy has always irritated the ever living Hell out of me, and last night he just reinforced his whole jerk persona.

I have never understood why R and Dip Shit are such good friends. They are so opposite. This bond was forged in High School, maybe that's it. Maybe R just can't "let go"? Regardless it's a match made in Hell.

We sit there talking to the pair for a good 15 minutes. Dip Shit has a severe case of diarrhea of the mouth and his "date" literally giggles at everything he says. I am shocked she didn't hurt herself bouncing her head around like that. She has to have a good case of whip lash today.

It had been a long weekend. My patience level is zero at this point, and you guys know how well I handle the "dumb" people. I walked into the kitchen so I could quietly bang my head on the counter, and R walks in behind me. He's giving me that damn, "I'm sorry" look again. I want to throw myself down on the floor and have a major hissy fit.

R: Baby, I am sorry. I don't want to be rude; I can't ask them to leave.

AM: Glad you are so in touch with your Miss Manners side.

R: I am sure they will get bored and leave soon.

AM: Are you high?? They are on their second beers R, do they look freaking bored to you?

R: It won't be long baby come on...

AM: I have been hearing a whole lot of baby come on this weekend Mister and I am getting a bit tired of it.

R: *giggles*

AM: What in the Hell are you laughing at?

R: You. You're just so cute when you are mad.

AM:

I should have kicked him. I should have gone back into the living room and said, "Listen Dip Shit, it's been really great seeing you tonight and catching up on all of your mindless adventures. It's been a pleasure meeting Miss Booby Giggle Pants and we wish we had more time to sit and visit. But we want to eat dinner and be alone tonight, so kindly finish your FREAKING beers and find the door."


But alas, I am the Queen of thinking things in my head, and sadly keeping them there. No, instead we went back to visit with the lovely couple for a good hour!

Now you tell me something. If you stopped by a friend’s house unannounced, with a "date" and they were getting ready to eat dinner.....wouldn't you kindly excuse yourself? Wouldn't you leave? Hell yes you would! Not Dip Shit. Idiot. I am so sending him a package of Monkey Pox!

By the time they left our meal was cold, my mood was even colder and my boyfriend looked scared. I tried to assure him I wasn't mad, but you know what...in some way I was. I mean I have catered to him all weekend long and I just wanted a nice night before it was Monday again. I know he couldn't be rude if his life depended on it, and I wouldn't want him to be. Well, maybe a little. It just rubbed me the wrong way.

We ate dinner, he rubbed my back, and I fell asleep thinking one thing...I missed the Sopranos for this???

AM